The before school bickering.
The endless questions.
The interrupting.
The whining.
Oh, but.....
The love.
The smiles.
The joy.
The carefreeness.
The easy laughter.
The snuggles.
These are the things I have been thinking about lately. Especially when the top four seem so prevalent some days. Because my kids are still on this earth. Still here with me, while so many parents and families are unable to say the same.
Like all of you out there, my mind has been reeling and my heart breaking over and over and over again the past few days. Why, why, why........... The tears have come and come some more. We will never understand ~ what, why or how. We will never understand the depth of pain too many families are feeling right now. And all I know to do is to pray. I am praying hard ~ and I am loving and holding and cherishing every minute.
As I wrapped presents today, I thought of the many that will go unopened.
As I baked cookies with my girls, I prayed for the families who won't hear the laughter and "sprinkle" debates fill the air of their kitchens. Noises that should be there. But are not.
And while I feel so much sadness, I am reminded in Matthew 24:36
"But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son,
but only the Father."
So I will continue to pray. Pray for those families who lost their "babies"their son's and daughters, the staff and teachers, they are daughters, girlfriends, mothers, wives and so much more to so many. But that is not where my prayers will end ~ there are so many who hurt, who need, who are lost, hungry, abused, and forsaken. Many who need forgiveness and love. But there is also so, so much to be thankful for ~ for people ~ for things ~ for words and actions.
And I will continue to love ~ love those I randomly encounter throughout the day (a bag of chocolates for the mail man, a door held for a stranger, a smile, a compliment) and especially for the family I have. The ones who are always on my mind and completely in my heart.
And we will continue to love, laugh, learn and make memories. As we did tonight.